I've been playing Tekken recently and it got me thinking. What if somebody got a load of different characters from various games and set them as the roster for the ultimate beat em' up? I think the following would fill the various niche's perfectly. You may like or dislike some of my choices, infact some of you (like Best Man) may be angry with me, some of you may even think I have too much time on my hands. But these are the risks I was brave enough and willing to accept
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Name: Kratos
From: God Of War
This one is obvious. Kratos killed
the god of war Ares, a
god! But not before decimating (not to mention rip-in-two, decapitate and tear apart) legions of classical greek monsters. A brutally simple character to use but delightfully difficult to master for hardcore gamers.
Special Move: Combo Of The Gods
Name: King Of The Cosmos
From: Katamari Damacy
Fair enough, he looks like a rejected Blevin Blectum stage costume. But he is the king of the universe you know, and has an entire lifetime of boxing experience. Aside from his natural martial prowess the King can summon mighty balls (or
'Katamaris' as they are known in the trade) that roll anyone and anything in its path. Plenty of off-kilter moves to learn for the more tricksy gamer.
Special Move: Royal Rainbow Suplex
Name: Solid Snake
From: Metal Gear Solid
A master of stealth and close-combat training Snake has faced seemingly invinvible superhumans and come through on experience and cunning alone, scarred but tougher than before. Not only that but he has the knowledge of his high IQ (though long-winded CGI inducing) codec buddies to call upon. Snake is perfect for the player who likes simple and efficent attacks, such as deadly grab moves and concise hand-to-hand melee.
Special Move: Foxhound Chokeslam
Name: Pyramid Head
From: Silent Hill 2
This horrifyingly phallic offal-strewn abomination is one of the toughest enemies in SH, as a physical mannifestation of masculine agression his role as a beat em' up character was secure before I even started the topic. He carries a ridiculously oversized rusty knife like some hideous parody of a final fantasy protaganist. Pyramid Head is best suited to players he prefer critically damaging moves over mobility.
Special Move: Rusty Sword Lunge (
)
Name: Ratchet
From: Ratchet & Clank
As agile as a cat (well, Lombax actually) and armed to the teeth this furry alien techno-adventurer certainly isn't short of attack options. Though to describe this battler as one man act would be fair as Ratchet would be no where without his midget robot companion Clank, giving him the ability to fly and being the brains behind Ratchets brawn. Perfect for players who enjoy a mixture of agile base attacks, strong multi-weapon combos and heavy fucking metal.
Special Move: Laser Strafe To Insane Missile Barrage Combination
Name: Lara Croft
From: Tomb Raider
Lara, the aristocratic poster-girl done-good of the playstation has the moves to back up her reputation as the consoles iconic figure. If her acrobatic kung-fu'ery doesn't cut the cheese her charisma, wit and meaty selection of firearms will. She's best suited for players who like flashy dextrous moves at the expense of average damage, and perverts who just want to look at her
'particulars' during cutscenes.
Special Move: Tomb Raid Piledriver
Name: Lucas Kane
From: Fahrenheit
Now I now this is an obscure one but Mr. Kane fits the bill perfectly. With an angsty background story of madness and conspiracy, matrix lawsuit-worrying abilities and clairvoyant mind powers Lucas Kane can show his more popular breathren a thing or two about martial arts. Perfect for players who want a character with substance and mystique, and weird bullwt-dodging powers.
Special Move: Future Proof Counter Attack
Name: Dante
From: Devil May Cry
Cocky, Andy Warhol look-a-like half-demon Dante hasn't just inherited brimstone BO and necrobestial urges from his abyssal dad. He can witstand mortal injuries as though they were papercuts, move with unnatural grace and speed, and wields a winning combination of big-fuck-off-pre-human sword and guns with infinate ammo. If that wasn't enough he can on certain occasions turn into a winged armor-plated horror and fling elemental energy at his pesky demonic enemies. Perfect for players who like hard hitting repetetive attacks and jeering at other characters.
Special Move: Devil Trigger Trip
Name: Torque
From: The Suffering
Sentenced for supposedly murdering his family in cold-blood Torque was imprisoned on the notorious Carnate island, and there are much worse things there than some shaven tatooed man asking you to
'pick-up-the-soap'. Torque can turn into a huge blade-armed monster whenever his short temper snaps and the tantrums he throws are of messy biblical proportions. Perfect for players who want the best of both worlds; a practical tough combatant who has the option of shifting into a high-damage alter ego.
Special Move: Carnate Shiv Kick
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I might add more but i'm tired right now. Have you any suggestions of your own? Thank you for wasting about 5 minutes of your life reading this
Vega B.
