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Belly Button
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Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 6:32 pm |
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Zero Tolerance Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2006 7:18 pmPosts: 6315Location: Landscape XX
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(I thought we already had this topic - sadly a dozen different search parameters found nothing. Time to start a new thread)
Assume you suddenly gained control of the planet for no reason at all (it could happen) what unreasonable and insane laws / decrees would you make.
1: Exile Ricky Gervais to Pluto. 2: Ban Russell Brand and Sarah Silverman from reality. They would automatically be breaking the law just by existing. 3: Officially make Mr. Daves what a storma! korma the national dish. 4: Give police the use of maguns. 5: Commission a giant sculpture by Damien Hirst that consists of a giant Millenium Dome sized glass box filled with hundreds of dead whales preserved in that formhydrowhatsit stuff. 6: Michael Winner would be made to write a 5000 word essay apologizing to the people of the world for being an annoying cock. This essay would then be carved into a huge slab of marble and put on display in the capital, right next to a realistic statue of Brian Blessed violenty sodomizing him. 7: That reminds me, Brian Blessed would become the official and brutally enforced religion of the world. It would be mandatoy for all churches, synagogues and mosques to convert to him and display his likeness (ie his massive shouting face) atop the spires, domes, roofs, etc. 8: Turn Antony Gormley's Angel Of The North sculpture into a powerful flight capable justice dispensing mechabot. 9: Bestiality wouldn't just be publically accepted, but mandatory (in homage to Best Man) 10: Fund research into bringing the entire cast of Last Of The Summer Wine back to life. 11: Set up a puppet regime in Britain with David Tibet as its leader (I say puppet regime, but actually I bum the mans music so much i'd let him do what he likes with our fair island) 12: Ingrid Newkirk and Alex Pacheco would be forced to eat KFC for the rest of their lives.
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TheFamousEccles
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Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 8:27 pm |
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Highly Intolerant Joined: Sat Dec 31, 2005 6:51 pmPosts: 3217Location: Near Glasgow, Scotland
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_________________ "You can't put man in a room with no subwoofers." ― Mala |
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Belly Button
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Posted: Wed Aug 05, 2009 10:36 am |
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Zero Tolerance Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2006 7:18 pmPosts: 6315Location: Landscape XX
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Best - Man
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Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:16 pm |
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Highly Intolerant Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2004 7:36 pmPosts: 4470Location: Fighting crime
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Make homosexuality mandatory to ensure extinction of species.
_________________ The Best Superhero In The Entire Universe
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Belly Button
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Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 10:45 pm |
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Zero Tolerance Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2006 7:18 pmPosts: 6315Location: Landscape XX
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Best - Man
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Posted: Sat Aug 08, 2009 9:15 pm |
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Highly Intolerant Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2004 7:36 pmPosts: 4470Location: Fighting crime
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To be honest, it's because I want a really fucking fit guy to fuck in the arse, but don't have any rohypnol.
_________________ The Best Superhero In The Entire Universe
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Not A Horse Fluffer
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Posted: Tue Aug 11, 2009 10:06 pm |
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Spammer Joined: Wed Aug 25, 2004 8:41 pmPosts: 4140Location: The Internet
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A couple of Babyshams and I'm all yours besty.
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alexyork
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Posted: Fri Sep 04, 2009 12:32 pm |
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Staff Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2004 6:38 pmPosts: 1008Location: UK, London
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Best - Man
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Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2009 9:48 am |
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Highly Intolerant Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2004 7:36 pmPosts: 4470Location: Fighting crime
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I've had a quote in there, a picture in there, all I need now is a letter or to be interviewed...
brb forming bands
_________________ The Best Superhero In The Entire Universe
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alexyork
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Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2009 9:50 am |
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Staff Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2004 6:38 pmPosts: 1008Location: UK, London
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you could call your band "Best Men".
geddit?
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Belly Button
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Posted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 4:51 pm |
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Zero Tolerance Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2006 7:18 pmPosts: 6315Location: Landscape XX
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-BASTARD - MAN-
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Posted: Fri Nov 20, 2009 11:50 am |
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Low Tolerance Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 11:36 amPosts: 216Location: BREAKING THE FUCKING LAW
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YOU'D ALL BE DEAD OR TURNED INTO FURRIES. AND FURRIES WILL BE DEAD
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KnutM
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Posted: Sat Jan 16, 2010 4:13 pm |
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Low Tolerance Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2005 2:17 pmPosts: 166Location: Lincoln, UK
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_________________ All people have red blood and salted tears, thats why we're doomed to die |
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