I've had an idea for a thread thats both fun AND informative. They're the best sort i'm sure you'll agree. Perhaps not. Whatever the case in this thread we give reviews to records of any format (CD, Vinyl, albums, single, etc) and like any review we give a score and a description of the music. Except theres a twist. Can you guess what it is? If you were wise and cunning enough to read the thread title you would probably know the answer by now.
Each review can only be a sentence long, minimum one word. The score system works on a the same principle except you aren't limited to one sentence. This is where you have to get really creative, minimum one word. Are you ready?...

Dwelling In A Dead Raven For The Glory Of Crucified Wolves by Wolfmangler
Its got one good song on it and the rest sound, honestly and without exagerration, EXACTLY the same.
SCORE: - Hours per day a Koala sleeps / 10

Initiations by Burial Hex
Listening to the first LP made me believe that the Ager brothers were coming to sacrifice me.
SCORE: The amount of open sores, boils, pus seeping wounds, maggot infested flesh patches and flies can be found on both Father Nurgle's body and inside Russell Brand's mouth / 10

Inerrant Rays Of Infallible Sun (Blackship Shrinebuilder) by OM/Current 93
One really fine-ass bit of doom followed by one of Miseur Tibet's most disappointing efforts.
SCORE: The ranch sauce you can get at Subway that tastes horrible when its cold but is actually not bad when its on a toasted steak n' cheese sub / 10

Vol. 1 by Wooden Shjips
Theres, like, a universe in all of us man...
SCORE: Googolplex / 10

Saint Dymphia by Gang Gang Dance
Can you imagine a world where disco was invented by French freudian psychologists along with their token Spanish guy?
SCORE: Eye + Mind ½ Mind - Eye / 10

~

Come onnnn! Don't ignore this thread. If I may say so myself tis' a good topic!

The Darkthrone discography excluding Soulside Journey and all their demos
"Don't be a knobber, go buy it"

Street Horrrsing by Fuck Buttons
Manages to be as majestic as a space phoenix yet somehow as unnoticeable as a bit of dried bluetack on a baby blue wall.
SCORE: Amount of unashamed use of synthesizers on this album / 10

Dystopia by Midnight Juggernauts
What you get when you cross Doctor Who with Nu Rave.
SCORE: Best album of the year / 10

The Nebulous Dreams by Kiss The Anus Of A Black Cat
It is as darkly and miserably brilliant as the bands name is horrible (*jibblies)
SCORE: 1651 / 10

Audiomatique by Various Artists
Dance setlist by Adultnapper, I brought it because I liked the DJ's name.
SCORE: BPM / 10

Minor Threat by Minor Threat
I heart this kind of punk, guilty of being white indeed!
SCORE: The unfortunate amount of Straight Edger's and Neo Nazi's who heart this record / 10

Galgenfrist by Nortt
Initially feels suitably bleak and nihilistic but somewhat fizzles out about half-way through.
SCORE: Sucessful assassination attempts on Rusell Brands life / 10

The Seldom Seen Kid by Elbow
Depressing and beautiful all at once, like an angrily drunk Kari Byron.
SCORE: My brother Jon's daily hobnob intake / 10

Vultures by Fate
Short but sweet macho hardcore that doesn't outstay its welcome trying to hard to be epic.
SCORE: Suicide Silence's breakdown rate / 10

Inherit by Free Kitten
Sonic Youthesque and boy do the band know it.
SCORE: That oment you reckoned you saw a Giraffe in a Kandinsky piece / 10

Blaspheny For Satan by Diametregon
95% of what makes metal classic turns up on this album, pure blasphemic joy.
SCORE: Souls in the circles / 10

^ Yay! An actual bonafide post!

Titan Death by Tenhornedbeast
23 minutes and 28 seconds of one long droning sound.
SCORE: I suppose it would of been better had I been paying more attention / 10